Self-Imposed Limitation
I used to joke that I have no left brain. I’m highly mathephobic, I can’t tell north from south without a map, and I rarely think in any kind of a linear fashion. (Incidentally, I get migraines from time to time and once had a CAT-scan for it. The left brain is actually there, and not the giant crater I suspected was in its place.)
When given a math problem, I will freeze up. I fret over it. I get angry because I feel stupid. But. Walking through the grocery store, I routinely toss things into the cart without paying much attention, but when I get to the checkout, I can usually tell you within $10 how much I’ve spent before I start loading it up on the counter. In the kitchen, doubling, tripling, or halving a recipe results in thoughtless, but accurate measurements. If I’m not paying attention, I can add large sums within seconds. Ask me to do it, and I’ll find it’s impossible. Result? I can’t do math. Don’t even bring up the subject or I’ll break out in a sweat.
The same is true with directions. Please don’t tell me go north, turn east five miles, then south at the seven-mile marker. First, I won’t remember numbers, and second, what direction am I facing now? My husband laughs at me when I navigate on road trips because I’m constantly turning the map to face whatever direction we’re driving. In my mind, this makes sense. To him, I’ve now made north face west, but to me, I know north is now to the left of us. It doesn’t make sense to me for the map not to align with our path. I didn’t change the directions, I simply turned the map with the car.
The point is, we spend a lot of time declaring what we can’t do, what we’re not good at. I am the first to say I suck at math and have no sense of direction. Yet, I regularly do equations in my head quickly and accurately when I’m not thinking about it. Also, my husband tells me I’m the best navigator he’s ever been with on a road trip. So, why am I so convinced I’m horrible at those things?
For years, I believed I couldn’t write dialogue. Now, people tell me it’s one of my strengths in my writing.
How many other things in my life have I held back on because I thought I couldn’t do them? A year and a half ago, I’d have told you my biggest failing was an inability follow through. Now, two novels later, I guess I’m going to have to drop that one. Saying it over and over was perpetuating the myth. When I finally shut up about it, I learned I’m fully capable of completing what I start.
We limit ourselves by habit. What are you convinced you can’t do? What do you tell yourself on a regular basis you aren’t capable of doing?
Do it anyway, just for fun. Rumors of your ineptitude are probably largely hearsay.
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